I kept delaying writing this topic because it’s associated with a memory from my past.
Before I got changed careers into Life Coaching and writing, I used to work in IT support in Saudi.
This was simply because I was living from a conditioned place and not aligned with my true, authentic self.
Before starting a new IT support job in a corporate company, my mother told me: “Don’t laugh out loud!”
She was basically giving me advise on how to behave and act in a corporate environment.
What this meant was that I would have to dim myself, make myself small and tone down my authentic self.
I’m someone who loves to laugh and I like to laugh out loud – it’s just part of my character and personality.
Our parents say things that stay with us and can actually hold us back from living to our full potential.
How this relates to Dating
When dating, you want to embrace and show your true self. Because if you don’t, the other person won’t get to know the real you and so they can’t decide if they like you.
Another thing that happens if you don’t date with authenticity is that your true self will eventually show up. So you might as well be that person from the start and not waste time being someone else.
The truth is that the right person will like your original, quirky traits and love you for who you are in essence. This includes your flaws – and I’m not saying that laughing out loud is a flaw at all.
I just want to make it clear that the person who will choose to commit to you will love everything about you. So you don’t have to hide any aspect of your personality. Just be the real you and show that when you date.
Another example is that I’m talkative, intense, playful and I always go against the grain. There’s no reason for me to hide any of these traits when meeting someone. If they don’t like these traits, it will be easier to filter them out from the start.
Why it’s Important to Find your True Self
I believe that once you find your true self, make peace with who you truly are and feel confident and secure in that personality, you start to attract others who want to be around you.
It’s also important for you to reach a good level of self-actualization before you start dating.
Your person can’t really find you when you’re hiding under tons of layers of family and societal conditioning.
So today, I encourage you to invest in doing the inner work to find the real you and to embrace that beautiful personality when dating and meeting new people.
I also suggest that you don’t delay this inner work because it’s vital for manifesting your person.
I personally feel that it takes time to shed the layers of conditioning and to make peace with who you are – especially if you were raised by controlling and opinionated parents.
What are your thoughts on this? Are you embracing and honoring your true, authentic self in each moment of your day? Do you date from a place of feeling confident and secure with the real you? Let me know in the comments!